Team Contacts
1.800.622.6549 (LA only)

Bill Robertson, Director Pastoral Leadership Team
ext. 291

JoLynn Chesser, Administrative Assistant
ext. 292

Stacy Morgan, Church Administration Strategist
ext. 293

Dianne York, Administrative Assistant
ext. 231

Eddie DeHondt, Bivocational Smaller Church Consultant - North

Gary Mitchell, Bivocational Smaller Church Consultant - South
ext. 294

Benjamin Harlan, Music Strategist
ext 234


Pastoral Team

Fifty Ways to Love Your Pastor, Staff, and their Spouses 

Your pastor, staff and their families are the key to your church’s future, whether it be growth, discipleship, evangelism, or social concerns.  How much better could they perform and lead if they knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, they and their families were loved, supported and lifted up by their congregation?

Below, you’ll find 50 suggestions to get you started.  Some are for individuals, others for the church.  We’re sure you’ll come up with more, tailored specifically to the pastor and staff God has placed in your church. 

For convenience and consistency in this brochure, we have used “he” and “him”, but virtually all the suggestions apply equally to women in ministry.  Likewise, suggestions for the pastor apply equally to other staff members, missionaries, etc.

  1. Write him a note telling him how good the sermon was.
  2. Write his wife and/or children a note telling them what you like about their husband/dad.
  3. Drop him a note or funny card just to brighten his day.
  4. Offer to watch the children to free your pastor and spouse up for an old fashioned date.
  5. Take him fishing, golfing, sailing or whatever else he likes.  Don’t talk about church during this time.
  6. Don’t’ say negative things about him in front of your children or others.  Model appropriate behavior by talking directly to him when you have a concern.
  7. Take the family to lunch after church . . your treat!
  8. Keep a tight rein on your personal expectations of the pastoral family and the church staff.
  9. Be sure the pastor and staff members have at least one day off per week, then ensure they take it.
  10. Pray with and for (daily) your pastor and his family.  Go by the church office early enough on Sunday morning to pray before services, form a prayer group for the pastor and his needs, or make arrangements to come by the house and pray for the entire family.
  11. Congratulate, show appreciation and love.  We all need encouragement.
  12. If the pastor is not a mechanic or gardener, take care of car repairs or mow his yard, but only if wanted.
  13. It there is a parsonage and a committee, make sure they see to needed repairs regularly, but never assume ownership of the home and enter when uninvited.
  14. Good spiritual, emotional and mental health should be reinforced with adequate vacation time.
  15. Chauffeur the family where there’s a need.
  16. Transportation can sometimes be a problem for a large family.  Perhaps a car provided for the use of the pastor and staff during the day would alleviate family car shuffling problems.
  17. Invite others to church. Nothing says “He’s doing a great job” louder than asking your friends and business acquaintances to visit.  Introduce them after the service.
  18. Provide a freezer for the parsonage and stock it with meat once a year.
  19. Provide a phone answering machine for the parsonage.
  20. Ask & ask again “How can I help?”
  21. Give, give and give again - tickets to concerts, musicals, the circus, etc., a new suit for the pastor, lessons for the children if you teach, haircuts and perms for the family if a beautician.
  22. Teach your pastor a hobby, it's a lasting gift.
  23. Care for the family's health - provide medical services/counsel if you're a doctor or nurse. Be sure to provide adequate medical insurance.
  24. Make annual physicals mandatory for pastor and spouse and pay for them.
  25. A staff membership in a health club is a wise investment for the church.
  26. Be alert to special medical conditions of your pastor and family when preparing meals or expecting participation.  Heart patients, diabetics and severely allergic people deserve special consideration.
  27. Participation in conferences and seminars for both Pastor and spouse, such as counseling, evangelism, and church growth are necessary to keep their ministry fresh. Continuing education conferences and seminars are not vacations!
  28. As a Church, pay your pastor as well as you possibly can.  Salary should be flexible and open to adjustment based on real needs of the pastoral family.
  29. Be alert for signs of stress and fatigue.  Too many meetings, too many programs and long hours in the office can lead to burnout for pastor and his family.
  30. Remember the pastoral family's birthdays and anniversaries and celebrate these occasions.
  31. If you have a special talent or area of service, use it for the pastor and staff. If you're a wonderful baker -take some goodies by the church for all of the staff; if you farm or have a garden bring farm products; offer to do taxes if this is your specialty; or, to review insurance or financial planning.
  32. Allow the pastor's wife the privilege of being JUST WHO SHE IS, Don't place expectations on her that reflect former pastor's wives. Love her, learn from her, seek her advice, help her when needed.
  33. Include the ministry family in your activities outside church -golf, dinner, concerts, picnics - but give them the right to decline.
  34. Allow your pastor's wife to pursue a career if it is her desire and a need of the family. If she does work outside the home, remember her role will be a difficult one to balance with church, career, family and the needs of her mate.
  35. Buy him something he needs, but wouldn't spend money on for himself.
  36. Buy him something totally frivolous.
  37. Take your place in the life of the church.  Find YOUR area of service.
  38. See that future needs are provided for the family. Help plan for these needs. IRA's, savings and retirement plans should all be reviewed and kept current for the family.
  39. Be aware of very special needs the family is saving for.  When appropriate, make contributions to this fund. Be especially sensitive to this need around Christmas time.
  40. Take your pastor and spouse on vacation with you. It can be the trip of a lifetime.
  41. Be open to develop a real and close relationship with the minister, spouse and family.  Don't force it or push it and don’t expect special treatment or favors from the family because of your relationship.
  42. Check your spirit constantly to see if you are manipulative in any way in your desires for the church.
  43. Be real and honest around the pastoral family.
  44. Treat the minister’s children in a natural way.  They are real and struggling children, just as yours are or were.  Include them in activities your children are having.
  45. Keep expectations of kids in check. Don't expect them to be theological or saintly.
  46. Just as you know the interests of the pastor and spouse, find out about those of the children.  Remember them with gifts or gestures appropriate to their likes.
  47. As much as possible, protect your pastor's privacy.
  48. Let your pastor know when you have received a real spiritual insight or breakthrough as a result of his teaching or preaching.
  49. BE A CONSISTENT CHRISTIAN. Fulfill at least the minimum requirements:
    a. Attend services and Sunday School regularly.
    b. Pray for your church, your pastor and his family and the staff and their families.
    c. Find at least one area of service where your talents, gifts or desires can be used
    d. Be teachable -always open to learning and new experiences with the Lord.
    e. Forget the seven deadly words, "We have always done it that way.
    f. If you are not tithing to your church, at least begin to work toward a full tithe in your giving.
    g. Look for opportunities daily to tell people about your church and what you like about it. 
    h. Always look for opportunities to tell people about Jesus, who He is and what He can do in lives. Share what He has done in your life.
  50. "And we urge you, brethren, to recognize those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you and to esteem them very highly in love for their work's sake." 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13

For Ministry Wives Only:

Go the extra mile and offer the resources for them to attend the Ministry Wives Retreat at Tall Timbers Baptist Camp in Alexandria on October 14 - 15, 2011.
Contact Women’s Missions & Ministry for information. Gift Certificates are available from the Women’s Missions & Ministry office.

For the Pastor Only:

Choose a Sunday in October to observe Pastor Appreciation Day.

Pastoral Leadership Team

Bill Robertson – Director ext. 291
Jo Lynn Chesser – Admin. Assist. ext. 292                                                                                                                                                     Stacy Morgan – Church Administration ext. 293                                                                                                                                             Dianne York - Admin. Assist. ext. 231
Gary Mitchell and Eddie DeHondt – Bivocational and Smaller Churches                                                                                                          Benjamin Harlan - Worship Arts ext. 234